For Little Miss H's second Christmas I compiled a list of activities for us to do during Advent. Last year I planned to do this again but unfortunately it did not happen. I was so anxious during my pregnancy that I wasn't able to concentrate on anything else. This year everything is different. Little Mister H is almost five months old. Little Miss H is now at pre-school. And I am in a much better place. So once again I plan to…
14 years ago today, I woke up in hospital. I was still alive. The night before I had taken numerous packets of ibuprofen in an attempt to kill myself. I can't describe in words the desolation I felt that I had not succeeded. That I was still alive. That I had to carry on living with the endless turmoil and numbness of depression.…
I love going into the shops at this time of year and seeing all the Christmas party clothes in stock. It makes me feel that the magic of Christmas is just round the corner. I recently spent a lovely time in my local JoJo Maman Bébé store lusting over all the gorgeous Christmas clothes for both Little Miss and Little Mister H. As a child my mum always bought me a special dress to wear on Christmas day. Knowing that…
"You can't control what happens in life but you can control your reaction to it." These words were written in a letter to me when I was in my early 20's and suffering terribly from depression. They were the very wise words of my wonderful Great Uncle David. In the past few days this phrase has been running through my mind. On Wednesday 9th November 2016, I woke up to a world that I didn't recognise.…
Welcome to the very first post in the My rainbow baby blog series. I have created this series in the wish that it will give hope to anyone who has experienced baby loss. Little Miss H and Little Mister H are not the only rainbow babies. There are many of them. And I want to share the beautiful and poignant tales of these special rainbow babies. I am inviting others to tell these stories. To talk about these precious children in their own…