Trigger warning: This post has references to attempted suicide and overdoses. If you have personal experience of this subject then you may find it triggering. 17 years ago today I took my final overdose. It was one of a number of attempts to commit suicide. But it was the one that changed my life forever. And it is a night that I will never forget. The Night That I Will Never Forget After the overdose, I was taken to the…
Trigger warning: This post contains details of attempted suicide. You may find it triggering if you have personal experience of this subject. The memory is a funny old thing! There are times when I can’t remember what I did yesterday. Then there are days that stay with you forever. Sometimes these days are the best days of your life – the day you got married or gave birth to your children. But sometimes these days are the worst days of…
Trigger warning: This post contains references to depression and attempted suicide. You may find this triggering if you have personal experience of such subjects. Dear Lucy I know that this is the most traumatic year of your life. I know that you’re broken. And you’re looking for a way to mend yourself. But there doesn’t seem to be a solution. The pain and depression are too intense. The hole is too deep. Nothing can fill it. You feel like you’re…
Trigger warning: If you have personal experience of suicide or suicidal depression then you may find this post upsetting. If you’re currently struggling with suicidal thoughts and you’re in danger then please call 999 and request an ambulance immediately. My dear girl As I write this letter to you, I have tears pricking the back of my eyes. My heart hurts thinking of you lying in that hospital bed. Because last night you took an overdose. It was your fourth.…
On Monday the singer Sinead O’Connor posted a heartbreaking video to her Facebook page. O’Connor films the footage in a grotty hotel in New Jersey. And in it she is clearly in the middle of a depressive episode. She is distraught. Beside herself. Her thoughts tumble into one another. And as you watch you can see and hear her heart break and her soul rip into thousands of tiny pieces. It is a horrid video to watch. Especially for someone,…
14 years ago today, I woke up in hospital. I was still alive. The night before I had taken numerous packets of ibuprofen in an attempt to kill myself. I can't describe in words the desolation I felt that I had not succeeded. That I was still alive. That I had to carry on living with the endless turmoil and numbness of depression.…
TRIGGER WARNING: If you have personal experience of mental ill health or suicide then you may find this post upsetting. I can’t imagine the despair that Robin Williams’ friends and family are feeling right now. I can’t imagine the pain that Robin Williams felt when he made the decision to take his own life. But I know how I felt. I know how I felt when I decided enough was enough. When I made the decision that the…