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For this mummy, the witching hour is not midnight. It is not the time when witches, ghosts and ghouls appear.
For this mummy, the witching hour is the time period between making Little Miss H’s dinner and leaving her room knowing that she is in sleepy land. It is when chaos descends.
For this mummy, the witching hour is when I look around the flat, hang my head in shame and wonder how the hell it got so messy.
For this mummy, the witching hour is when I run around like a blue arsed fly. When I tend to Little Miss and restore order to the flat.
For this mummy, the witching hour (or hours) look something like this:
17:00 – Make Little Miss H pasta and a vegetable sauce for dinner.
17:15 – Serve Little Miss H dinner. Put a load of laundry into the washing machine.
17:20 – Little Miss H’s dinner ends up on the floor
17:25 – Serve Little Miss H second dinner.
17:26 – Start to tidy bedroom; change sheets on the bed; put clothes away and fill Mrs H’s box of miscellaneous crap (please don’t ask).
17:40 – Little Miss H throws second dinner onto the floor.
17:45 – Give Little Miss H some fruit and sultanas to eat. Turn the TV onto CBeebies to keep her happy.
17:55 – Bedroom complete!
17:57 – Wash grapes for Little Miss H, hand her these and the water bottle she has thrown on the floor.
17:59 – Begin to tidy Little Miss H’s room; put away the toys that belong in the nursery; sort out Little Miss’s clothes; organise another load of washing for the machine and prep the room for bedtime.
18:10 – Little Miss H’s room sorted! Give Little Miss H some more fruit and some breadsticks to eat.
18:12 – Begin to tidy the hall and bathroom; throw away rubbish; sort out even more clothes; put out some clean towels; sweep and wash the floors and prep the bathroom for bedtime.
18:24 – Hall and bathroom – tick!
18:25 – Mr H arrives home. Celebrate.
18:26 – Greet Mr H and share news. Discuss what we are eating for dinner. Mr H entertains Little Miss H (who is very happy at her daddy’s appearance) and I tidy the kitchen; load the dishwasher; wash and dry the dishes; wipe work surfaces; put food away; organise paperwork; unload washing machine and hang laundry to dry; put away sheets; load the washing machine; sweep and wash the floor and disinfect the highchair.
18:45 – Mr H begins to cook dinner. Clean up after him.
18:55 – Finish kitchen. Grab a drink. Mr H continues to entertain Little Miss.
18:58 – Move on to the living room; tidy up paperwork; clean dropped food off the floor; put away toys, books and DVDS.
19:05 – The living room and thus the whole flat are now tidy. Hurrah!
19:06 – Have a celebratory loo break.
19:08 – Start the ritual of getting Little Miss ready for bed. Run around the flat after her in an attempt to give her some calpol and teething powder. Run around the flat after her trying to clean her teeth.
19:15 – Mr H called in as reinforcements. Team work needed to change Little Miss H’s nappy and dress her in her PJs. Mr H and Little Miss have sleepy cuddles. I tidy the bathroom after nappy change.
19:20 – Little Miss enters her room to go to bed. I read her a bedtime story; “Dinosaurs love underpants” (complete with silly voices).
19:25 – Daddy comes to say good night. The lamp is turned off and Little Miss H’s slumber frog is switched on.
19:30 – I cuddle Little Miss until she falls asleep.
19:45 – Little Miss H is asleep in her cot. My contact lenses come out, glasses, cosy socks and a big snuggly cardigan go on. Feet up and iPad out. Peace at last!
Do you have a period of your day when you run around like this? Please tell me it is not just me that has to bring order to such chaos.
P.S. The following night Little Miss H added peeing on the floor and walking in it to the witching hour cocktail of activity. I was thrilled, as I am sure you can imagine.