Mother’s Day is now one of my favourite days of the year. Last Mother’s Day was absolutely fantastic. I was pregnant with our longed for rainbow baby. I got to have a lie-in, breakfast in bed, a family day out and a yummy meal in the evening. And Mr H had arranged the perfect gift. A pregnancy massage at the Champney’s City Spa in Tunbridge Wells. I believe that showing love and appreciation for the Mother in your life should…
Welcome back to my blog series, My Rainbow Baby. I am so sorry that I was not able to share a post last month. I was taking some time off from blogging to focus on myself and my family. I have created this blog series in the wish that it will give hope to anyone who has experienced baby loss or is struggling to have a longed for baby. To show that even after the darkest storm a rainbow can appear.…
I have a stalker. They've been a menacing presence in my life since I was 20. And since their appearance during my second year at university, there has been no escape. They've been every where I turned. Every where I looked. They threatened my life. And they filled me with self loathing and hatred. Setting me on a path to self destruction.…
Dear Baby, Today could have been your 4th birthday. Today your Daddy and I could have been singing happy birthday to you. We could have watched you open your presents. Seen you smile as you blew out the candles on your cake. We could have taken you to see the animals at London Zoo. Maybe you would have asked to take one of your new toys with you.…
Today marks the end of the first ever Pre & Post Natal Depression Awareness Week #PNDAW16 run by PANDAS (the UK's leading pre and post natal depression charity). In light of this, I wanted to share my story of perinatal mental health. My experience of perinatal mental illnesses may be slightly unusual as I have suffered from depression for almost 17 year; most of my adult life. At times, my mental health has been terrible. At other times it has been…
It is difficult to admit that something you have yearned for desperately has been a struggle. Ever since Little Miss H has been a few months old, I have wanted a second baby. The miscarriages that followed just made my desperation for that child more intense. Each loss took us further away from our longed for second child. But each loss made me more determined that we needed to become a family of four.…