Browsing Tag

depression

Sharing The Story Of My Depression For Mental Health Awareness Week #MHAW17

Posted on May 13, 2017

An introductory post to why I have decided to share My Story of Depression. I plan to write an autobiographical series that documents my Mental Health over the years. Sharing My Story of Depression for Mental Health Awareness Week 2017 #MHAW17

I have suffered from depression for 18 years of my life. And I will suffer with it until the day I die. Depression is a part of me. I’ve had it for the majority of my adult life. It has made me the person I am today. I know I’ve talked about it on this blog but I’ve mainly written pretty prose about feelings or the fear of relapsing. I haven’t ever talked about the nitty-gritty of living with depression. This…

Mental Health

15 Ways To Look After Your Mental Health

Posted on April 8, 2017

I’ve been quite open recently that my mental health hasn’t been brilliant. It certainly isn’t terrible but I haven’t been myself. I’ve been feeling anxious and unmotivated. There have been days when I have felt tearful, unable to control my mood and I have just wanted to clamber back into bed and sleep. My Mental Health There are many small reasons why my depression has relapsed. The stress and sadness of the recurrent miscarriages and the anxiety I felt in my…

Motherhood

A Letter To My Children

Posted on March 26, 2017

A photograph of two children, a little girl and her baby brother, sitting inside a tee pee and smiling adoringly at one another - To my children on mothers day - Mrs H's favourite things

Dear Little Miss and Little Mister H One of my greatest fears is that you will never know how much I love you. That you won’t understand that I feel truly blessed to have you in my life. You and your Daddy are my world. My life. You are my favourite of all my favourite things. Sometimes I am sad, or tired, or grumpy. I might snap at you or raise my voice. I may be doing jobs when you wish I…

Mental Health

The Stalker

Posted on February 26, 2017

I have a stalker. They've been a menacing presence in my life since I was 20. And since their appearance during my second year at university, there has been no escape. They've been every where I turned. Every where I looked. They threatened my life. And they filled me with self loathing and hatred. Setting me on a path to self destruction.…

Baby Loss Motherhood

An Open Letter To Our First Baby

Posted on January 14, 2017

A sepia tinted photograph of a young baby's feet and toes - A open letter to our first baby - Mrs H's favourite things

Dear Baby, Today could have been your 4th birthday. Today your Daddy and I could have been singing happy birthday to you. We could have watched you open your presents. Seen you smile as you blew out the candles on your cake. We could have taken you to see the animals at London Zoo. Maybe you would have asked to take one of your new toys with you.…

Mental Health

Being Alive

Posted on November 24, 2016

14 years ago today, I woke up in hospital. I was still alive. The night before I had taken numerous packets of ibuprofen in an attempt to kill myself. I can't describe in words the desolation I felt that I had not succeeded. That I was still alive. That I had to carry on living with the endless turmoil and numbness of depression.…

Baby Loss

An Open Letter To The Woman Who Has Just Miscarried

Posted on October 12, 2016

Dear friend It is traditional in these circumstances to say I am sorry for your loss. But those words seem empty and insulting. They imply that you have been careless and misplaced something valuable... a wallet, your keys, your phone. Those words don't convey that your world has come crashing down. They don't show that your heart is splintering into pieces. They don't speak of the shattering sobs that run through your whole body late at night. They don't tell of the emptiness that often manifests…

Mental Health Motherhood

Perinatal Mental Health #PNDAW16: It’s Okay Not To Be Okay

Posted on September 11, 2016

A faded photograph of a young woman looking wistful as the sun sets in a tropical setting behind her - Includes the title "Perinatal mental health #PNDAW16 - It's okay not to be okay" - Mrs H's favourite things

Today marks the end of the first ever Pre & Post Natal Depression Awareness Week #PNDAW16 run by PANDAS (the UK's leading pre and post natal depression charity). In light of this, I wanted to share my story of perinatal mental health. My experience of perinatal mental illnesses may be slightly unusual as I have suffered from depression for almost 17 year; most of my adult life. At times, my mental health has been terrible. At other times it has been…